Comments that I want to respond to:
MAX: But Angel, don't you EVER tell me I don't understand you. No, it's you who doesn't understand me!
No, I don't Max. I don't understand you! I want to...I really do. I know you've been through more than me, but that's why you can handle this better than me. I'm WEAK and I've NEVER been through something like this. That's why it's so hard for me. That's what you don't understand about me.
MAX: Brittany if you died it would be my fault. I tried to help but i jsut don't know what to do anymore! I'm so scared brittany, I don't want to loose you. Please... I can't loose you. If I loose you then I loose myself.
Why can't you see what you're writing? You're writing this to me, but you're also writing this to you, but in my words. It's the SAME FUCKING THING!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why can't you just take your own advice? Why? Please? Just try to. If you die I lose myself and I'll die! Please, just take yourown advice, read what you write to me, READ IT. I mean REALLY READ IT! Just, please. I'm begging you to help me Janae. You were right, you are the only one who TRULY understands me. I'm sorry. It's all I can say. I'm sorry.
Robby, I'm so so so so sorry. If you DO go out with me again, you WILL have to earn my trust back, okay? I DO really love you. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm just about ready to let go. But I need you. And I need Janae for me to live and Keep Holding On, okay? And I'm still learning to move on from the pain I've felt from TWO WEEKS AGO. You have to understand that. If I EVER seem mean or bitchy for whatever reason, it's probably just because something happened and I'm trying to deal with it. And there will ALWAYS be some doubt with Cayla and I don't know if I want to take that chance.
I'm sorry.
I truly am.
There's nothing more I can say. I'm sorry. Just sorry. I never meant to hurt anyone, but I can't help it! I didn't mean to. I didn't want to. It just happened. I feel horrible about this and I know I can't take it back. I wish I could. I really do. I son't know what to say to make this better. I don't know what to do to fix this. I don't know who I truly am anymore. I've turned into this, lying person who can't control what she says anymore and it ALWAYS comes out a lie! I don't want to be this person. I hate myself for what I've done and what I've turned into. I lie once, and my WHOLE life becomes one huge lie.
I just need help.
I need that one person in my life. Who won't lie to me at all. Who won't be angry with me when I don't want to talk about something and won't yell at me when I try to explain how I feel. I want that so bad and I thought I had it in Robby....But then Cayla came into the picture and I lost it all. I lost everything I ever lived for. He was my life, and I lost him...It was like dying. I never want this to happen again. I WANT to believe him, but I don't know...I said there will always be some doubt. *sigh*
You know what's making me sad right now?
I just remembered that I asked Robby to go to the chorus concert in the winter but he said no. He had also said he would go to the spring one, just to see me. Now, i'm afraid to ask him to go. I'm afraid he won't want to see ME but HER. Because she's in chorus too. *sigh* I don't know. I'll think everything over. Turn it over and over in my mind until I feel like I'm going to explode...I tend to do that alot lately.
x.X| [A]ngel |X.x
So torn between what I want and what I need. What I want is to stay away from love and Robby so I can't get hurt again. But I need him so bad...=[
Angel out.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
die die die
i want to die.
no one understands anything I say, no matter how hard I try to tell them. No one listens. They say they do, they say they will, but they DON'T. NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME, WILL LISTEN TO ME, LOVE ME, OR HOLD ME WHEN I'M SAD IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM.
I don't even know if I trust any (guy) anymore. I give my love to ONE person...I would have given him everything. But he turned his back on me for another girl. He says he loves us both, and he needs to make a desicion. well, 1) I am NOT going to sit around and wait for a decision. 2) If someone needs to think about who they like better between two people, why should either of them like him? There's always that little bit of doubt when one person likes two people and CHOOSES one of them to go out with.
Iggy thinks that choosing the person he "loves" best is the hardest decision of his life. Well, if Cayla says no, I am NOT EVER going to take him back!! (Just so you know Robby.) And...he shouldn't even deserve to be called "Iggy" anymore. w/e.
Anyway, If he thinks that choosing a PERSON is the hardest thing to choose, try choosing life or death. That's MY hardest decision. And, Robby, don't even TRY to tell me I don't understand or w/e you usually say. Cause YOU'RE the one who doesn't understand. YOU'RE the one who doesn't listen! Here I am, struggling for life, hanging on the edge, and you say you love HER and ME?! Then, you go and say you have to DECIDE between us?! NO! I will NEVER trust you again! NEVER!
You know, and this is to everyone here, I almost broke down in social studies class today, because I didn't finish my terms. Then, again in Chourus because of the song, God Help The Outcasts. I almost started to cry. I wanted to die more than anything this morning and no one - not even me - knows why! So if anyone, even Max, says they understand...You don't. No one understands how I'm feeling! NO ONE!
I just need someone.
I need someone who will love me no matter what! No matter who those other girls are. Someone who can trust me and who I can trust. Someone to call me beautiful and smart and funny, even if I say I'm not. Someone to argue with over silly things, like...whcih baseball team is better Red Sox or Yankees. (Well, the answeer here is clear, but you know...) I want someone there for me to cry on when I need it the most. Someone...Someone to...Love. Really really love. Who won't go and turn his back on me. Who won't tell me bad things. Who won't lie to me. I need someone like that. Just like that.
But I know that will never happen, so I can just stop dreaming now.
I am in SR and trying not to just, let go, right here, right now. Cry like there's no tomorrow. Cry until the world ends. Cry forever, until I die. Just, cry.
Maybe if I had a person like the one I described, my life wouldn't be so bad right now. Well, dream's over, and so's this post.
x.X| Angel |X.x
@->-- Is depressed.
no one understands anything I say, no matter how hard I try to tell them. No one listens. They say they do, they say they will, but they DON'T. NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME, WILL LISTEN TO ME, LOVE ME, OR HOLD ME WHEN I'M SAD IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM.
I don't even know if I trust any (guy) anymore. I give my love to ONE person...I would have given him everything. But he turned his back on me for another girl. He says he loves us both, and he needs to make a desicion. well, 1) I am NOT going to sit around and wait for a decision. 2) If someone needs to think about who they like better between two people, why should either of them like him? There's always that little bit of doubt when one person likes two people and CHOOSES one of them to go out with.
Iggy thinks that choosing the person he "loves" best is the hardest decision of his life. Well, if Cayla says no, I am NOT EVER going to take him back!! (Just so you know Robby.) And...he shouldn't even deserve to be called "Iggy" anymore. w/e.
Anyway, If he thinks that choosing a PERSON is the hardest thing to choose, try choosing life or death. That's MY hardest decision. And, Robby, don't even TRY to tell me I don't understand or w/e you usually say. Cause YOU'RE the one who doesn't understand. YOU'RE the one who doesn't listen! Here I am, struggling for life, hanging on the edge, and you say you love HER and ME?! Then, you go and say you have to DECIDE between us?! NO! I will NEVER trust you again! NEVER!
You know, and this is to everyone here, I almost broke down in social studies class today, because I didn't finish my terms. Then, again in Chourus because of the song, God Help The Outcasts. I almost started to cry. I wanted to die more than anything this morning and no one - not even me - knows why! So if anyone, even Max, says they understand...You don't. No one understands how I'm feeling! NO ONE!
I just need someone.
I need someone who will love me no matter what! No matter who those other girls are. Someone who can trust me and who I can trust. Someone to call me beautiful and smart and funny, even if I say I'm not. Someone to argue with over silly things, like...whcih baseball team is better Red Sox or Yankees. (Well, the answeer here is clear, but you know...) I want someone there for me to cry on when I need it the most. Someone...Someone to...Love. Really really love. Who won't go and turn his back on me. Who won't tell me bad things. Who won't lie to me. I need someone like that. Just like that.
But I know that will never happen, so I can just stop dreaming now.
I am in SR and trying not to just, let go, right here, right now. Cry like there's no tomorrow. Cry until the world ends. Cry forever, until I die. Just, cry.
Maybe if I had a person like the one I described, my life wouldn't be so bad right now. Well, dream's over, and so's this post.
x.X| Angel |X.x
@->-- Is depressed.
Monday, April 28, 2008
i want to kill you
max and nudge...yall got me saying oi every 5 words!! oi!! AAAHHH!!!!
i hate stuff.
i'm bored.
i'm tired.
i'm hungry.
i wanna go home!!!
ooohh!! i got a guitara tuner!! yay! lol
i went to north conway friday and took about 75 pictures in 2 days!! lol. we went to kangamagis highway and to mount washington, but the road was closed and stuff so we just kept driving up. i had sooo much fun!!!
love you all,
max you rock,
x.X| Angel |X.x
i hate stuff.
i'm bored.
i'm tired.
i'm hungry.
i wanna go home!!!
ooohh!! i got a guitara tuner!! yay! lol
i went to north conway friday and took about 75 pictures in 2 days!! lol. we went to kangamagis highway and to mount washington, but the road was closed and stuff so we just kept driving up. i had sooo much fun!!!
love you all,
max you rock,
x.X| Angel |X.x
Friday, April 18, 2008
Lean on me
when your not strong
i'll be your friend i'll help you carry on
for it won't be long
till i'm gonna need
somebody to lean on.
i love that song. its like mine and j's song i think.
i've been feeling SO great lately. me and my dad have been hanging out a lot lately and stuff. over vacation (yay!) me and my family are going to go to north conway and stay in a hotel. max is coming over tonight. i have to watch my cousin's bunny while shes away starting sunday i think. and my familhy has gotten closer.
some...times in our lives,
we all have pains
we all have sorrows
but...if we are wise
we know that there's
always tomorrow.
lean on me
when you're not strong
i'll be your friend
i'll help you carry ooonn
for..it won't be long
till i'm gonna need
somebody to lean on
~~Lean on me
x.X|.:Friends:.|X.x
Do the [R!GHT] thing (NO MATTER) {WHAT}
x.x| A N G E L |X.x
i'll be your friend i'll help you carry on
for it won't be long
till i'm gonna need
somebody to lean on.
i love that song. its like mine and j's song i think.
i've been feeling SO great lately. me and my dad have been hanging out a lot lately and stuff. over vacation (yay!) me and my family are going to go to north conway and stay in a hotel. max is coming over tonight. i have to watch my cousin's bunny while shes away starting sunday i think. and my familhy has gotten closer.
some...times in our lives,
we all have pains
we all have sorrows
but...if we are wise
we know that there's
always tomorrow.
lean on me
when you're not strong
i'll be your friend
i'll help you carry ooonn
for..it won't be long
till i'm gonna need
somebody to lean on
~~Lean on me
x.X|.:Friends:.|X.x
Do the [R!GHT] thing (NO MATTER) {WHAT}
x.x| A N G E L |X.x
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Laptops
Matt got one! Lucky! He got it yesterday...and he showed me it. It is black and has Windows Vista Priemium (or w/e) and it has a buit in webcam! Can you say...OMG LUCKY?!! I WANT ONE!! Cause I can.
After the Philidellphia trip this summer I'm going to save up for one because we don't get one in High School. =[ oh well...or...*evil grin* i could just...steal...Matt's...or Max's...lol just kidding.
*sigh* bored. oooh...
Eye L0ve x.X|.:F R I E N D S:.|X.x
They do the [RIGHT thing] {NO MATTER WHAT}
x.X|Angel|X.x
LEAN ON ME
http://www.dizzler.com/music/Bill_Withers/Lean_On_Me
After the Philidellphia trip this summer I'm going to save up for one because we don't get one in High School. =[ oh well...or...*evil grin* i could just...steal...Matt's...or Max's...lol just kidding.
*sigh* bored. oooh...
Eye L0ve x.X|.:F R I E N D S:.|X.x
They do the [RIGHT thing] {NO MATTER WHAT}
x.X|Angel|X.x
LEAN ON ME
http://www.dizzler.com/music/Bill_Withers/Lean_On_Me
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
This is suckish
Well, i'm not alowed to say whats going on with me (i'll have more on that later) but I can tell you this.
Max wanted to die. Like literally die. I don't know if she's really going to talk to someone or not, but she said she will. It just makes me sad. Max, if you're reading this, I'll do whatever you need. kk?
the other thing...ugh. makes me mad.
robby is being a total jerk lately. idc if you read this either. i don't want to tell you some things. and you have to get used to it. ya know...you are the worst person for trying to FORCE it out if me!!! I'm not ALLOWED to talk about it. okay? and I KNOW you love Cayla okay? idc. go out with her i...i am SO FUCKING MAD AT YOU FOR SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT OKAY?
anyways....
I l0ve x.X|.:Friends:.|X.x
Angel
Max wanted to die. Like literally die. I don't know if she's really going to talk to someone or not, but she said she will. It just makes me sad. Max, if you're reading this, I'll do whatever you need. kk?
the other thing...ugh. makes me mad.
robby is being a total jerk lately. idc if you read this either. i don't want to tell you some things. and you have to get used to it. ya know...you are the worst person for trying to FORCE it out if me!!! I'm not ALLOWED to talk about it. okay? and I KNOW you love Cayla okay? idc. go out with her i...i am SO FUCKING MAD AT YOU FOR SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT OKAY?
anyways....
I l0ve x.X|.:Friends:.|X.x
Angel
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Here at last
I am at school. It took me a while, but I'm here. I had to come today so that I could go to pathfinders. But me and my dad took a little bit of this morning off. We went to...yay...Target. But I got mmy semi-formal shoes and I got CANDY!!! Then we went to borders and my daddy bought me a visual learning guitar book. I can't wait to use it...but I probaly can't tonight because of pathfinders, food, and chores tonight and by then my brother will be sleeping.
vacation's next week!!
Max, Des, Nudge, And Chappy,
~x.X|.: I C O U L D N ' T L I V E W I T H O U T Y O U!!:.|X.x~
Thanks for being such good friends.
Max, you did the right thing, thank you...and my family loves you...(my real family)
Ari, sorry for the scare. =] forgive meeh? *hugs my "family"* i love you all!!!!!
x.X| A N G E L |X.x
x.X| Angel Marie |X.x
P.S....NO MORE DEPRESSION!!!! (I'm for real this time!) =]]]]]
vacation's next week!!
Max, Des, Nudge, And Chappy,
~x.X|.: I C O U L D N ' T L I V E W I T H O U T Y O U!!:.|X.x~
Thanks for being such good friends.
Max, you did the right thing, thank you...and my family loves you...(my real family)
Ari, sorry for the scare. =] forgive meeh? *hugs my "family"* i love you all!!!!!
x.X| A N G E L |X.x
x.X| Angel Marie |X.x
P.S....NO MORE DEPRESSION!!!! (I'm for real this time!) =]]]]]
Monday, April 14, 2008
I can't get enough!
I can't stop blogging!!! Its a MAJOR addiction!! lol. PROMOTING WEBSITE!!! PLEASE HELP ME PROMOTE IT!! http://besome1new.conforums.com
okay promo over.
whats up world?
yeah I'm bored...
x.X|.:Angel:.|X.x
.:Angel Marie:.
okay promo over.
whats up world?
yeah I'm bored...
x.X|.:Angel:.|X.x
.:Angel Marie:.
Friday, April 11, 2008
FINISHED!!
Zee website eez feeneeshed!! lol Translate: The website is finished!! lol.
whoooooo check it out!! pease? For meeh? Join mebee too? peeeeeeaaaaassssse??????? otay, bye bye mis amigoses!!
x.X| A N G E L |X.x
Br0ken [Hearts] Club
http://besome1new.conforums.com
x.X|.:Angel Marie:.|X.x
whoooooo check it out!! pease? For meeh? Join mebee too? peeeeeeaaaaassssse??????? otay, bye bye mis amigoses!!
x.X| A N G E L |X.x
Br0ken [Hearts] Club
http://besome1new.conforums.com
x.X|.:Angel Marie:.|X.x
Thursday, April 10, 2008
There's more
I am still....depressed.
Last night, I had the urge to do it again. F*ck it all!!!! It makes me SO angry!!! *sigh* I couldn't, so I'm okay now.
Max says talk to a trusted adult. I would, but one problem...I don't trust any adults. Especially my parents!! Maybe Robby's mom could help...idk. I'll figure sometihng out.
Anyone have any advice?
x.X|.:A N G E L:.|x.x
http://besome1new.conforums.com
I just HAD to tell you all. It would kill me if I didn't.
Last night, I had the urge to do it again. F*ck it all!!!! It makes me SO angry!!! *sigh* I couldn't, so I'm okay now.
Max says talk to a trusted adult. I would, but one problem...I don't trust any adults. Especially my parents!! Maybe Robby's mom could help...idk. I'll figure sometihng out.
Anyone have any advice?
x.X|.:A N G E L:.|x.x
http://besome1new.conforums.com
I just HAD to tell you all. It would kill me if I didn't.
Itchy...
My arm is itchy...totally random...hmmm...
hi.
My name is Angel. I am completly weird. I have nothing to write about...
I get to keep the guitar. yay! bored.
umm...
bye
x.X|.:A N G E L:.|X.x
JUST IN!!!! MY WEBSITE IS DONE...for the most part anyways. The boards are done I just have to fix the colors and stuff like that...so come check it out, kk? http://besome1new.conforums.com
hi.
My name is Angel. I am completly weird. I have nothing to write about...
I get to keep the guitar. yay! bored.
umm...
bye
x.X|.:A N G E L:.|X.x
JUST IN!!!! MY WEBSITE IS DONE...for the most part anyways. The boards are done I just have to fix the colors and stuff like that...so come check it out, kk? http://besome1new.conforums.com
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
America's Next Freak
I have the song stuch in my head...hehe.
We are entering our classes today for high school courses...gah! I REALLY don't want to go next year. Just...I don't like new things and stuff.
well, ummm...life is good. I had like 3 caffeine mints and i want to go to sleep!! lol. I have Jones soda in my backpack for lunch so yay!
lalala
I won't be America's next freak I will not lay down everytime you speak and if all you see is America's next freak then take me home just take me hoooo-ooome.
love the song and its stuck in mah head.
theres a dance friday and i'm not gonna go. i hate the dances hosted by Standish Rec. they suck, or so i've heard.
*shoots dance with bazooka* haha....*sigh*
robby....u....ugh....idk....u make me sad and angry and frustrated.....i hate people sometimes....especially....idk what i was gonna say....
WHOOOO WEBSITE!! ITS MINE ALL MINE!!!! http://besome1new.conforums.com
its not done yet though. soooo....don't go untill its done...i'll let u all know when.
x.X| A N G E L |X.x
We are entering our classes today for high school courses...gah! I REALLY don't want to go next year. Just...I don't like new things and stuff.
well, ummm...life is good. I had like 3 caffeine mints and i want to go to sleep!! lol. I have Jones soda in my backpack for lunch so yay!
lalala
I won't be America's next freak I will not lay down everytime you speak and if all you see is America's next freak then take me home just take me hoooo-ooome.
love the song and its stuck in mah head.
theres a dance friday and i'm not gonna go. i hate the dances hosted by Standish Rec. they suck, or so i've heard.
*shoots dance with bazooka* haha....*sigh*
robby....u....ugh....idk....u make me sad and angry and frustrated.....i hate people sometimes....especially....idk what i was gonna say....
WHOOOO WEBSITE!! ITS MINE ALL MINE!!!! http://besome1new.conforums.com
its not done yet though. soooo....don't go untill its done...i'll let u all know when.
x.X| A N G E L |X.x
Monday, April 7, 2008
Make sure you read
the post below. This is just...idk but the one below is the real one.
And this is to Robby only:
So, who are you lying to? Me or Cayla? You tell her that you don't like me and your all like I love you to me. So who are you lying to and why? You know what, I don't even wany to know. I know I said I'm forgiving everyone and everything, but that was Friday. This is today. Sunday, I really started over. So, no more grudges, no more lies, no more looking back on the past. No more of it. So...Starting now, I will NOT tolerate anyone LYING to ME, holding GRUDGES against ME (or friends) and I will NOT let anyone remind me of the past. So, Robby, MAKE UP YOUR MIND OKAY?
thanks...
x.X|.:A N G E L:.|X.x
p.s Max got me addicted to doing that.
And this is to Robby only:
So, who are you lying to? Me or Cayla? You tell her that you don't like me and your all like I love you to me. So who are you lying to and why? You know what, I don't even wany to know. I know I said I'm forgiving everyone and everything, but that was Friday. This is today. Sunday, I really started over. So, no more grudges, no more lies, no more looking back on the past. No more of it. So...Starting now, I will NOT tolerate anyone LYING to ME, holding GRUDGES against ME (or friends) and I will NOT let anyone remind me of the past. So, Robby, MAKE UP YOUR MIND OKAY?
thanks...
x.X|.:A N G E L:.|X.x
p.s Max got me addicted to doing that.
FORGET IT!!!
FORGET ABOUT ALL OF THE PAST AND DEORESSING POSTS!!! I AM NOT EMO OR DEPRESSED!!!!!! Me and Janae both moved on. I was at her house on Friday and we shredded all of it!! All the notes, poems, and drawings!! Then she threw away her knives and stuff she used to get high! I am SO proud of her and I love her like a sister sooooo much!! No one could be more happy than me today!!! And yesterday at church was a communion which my pastor said was a day to start over. I am so happy!!
Lots of love to all of ya,
x.X| S.M.I.L.E The world is R.O.U.N.D |X.x
~~Angel
Lots of love to all of ya,
x.X| S.M.I.L.E The world is R.O.U.N.D |X.x
~~Angel
Friday, April 4, 2008
sad but true
LET GO
Love turns to loved
Happy turns to sad
Social turns to alone
Canfident turns to scared
Hopeful turns to hopeless
We turn into nothing.
Almost like we never exsisted.
I should move on
but I know I'll never
Let go.
He's still in my heart
On my mind
In my soul.
But I should do what's right
and move on.
Let him live his life
without me.
Don't let him hurt
the one he's with.
Just let go.
~~Angel
Broken Hearts Club here.
Life is in the midst of...I don't know right now.
Well, I talked to Robby last night...I'm so confused. He confuses me. And makes me sad. And frustrates me. I hate love. Love is for losers. I am no loser. I don't need love...of maybe I do...maybe that's why I...*small voice* cut again last night. I'm so sorry. I just need help!! What do I do? Please someone help me? Please oh, please, just someone help me! I'm BEGGING for someone to help me right now. I keep pushing everyone away that wants to help, and I don't listen to their advice. All this anger is built up inside of me and it won't come out unless I make it bleed out!! I'm so confused and lost. Maybe Max and help me. Max, oh, Max, my sister, my friend, my refuge. I go to you for help. I don't listen and this is the price I pay. Please help me one last time. I swear I'll listen this time just help me...please? *cries* okay, I'm not really crying, but I want to soooooooo bad right now, but I'm in the middle of class so I won't.
Well, I'll try to be okay and smile.
.:Smile:. for me, the world is round.
~~Angel [depressed...idk]
Love turns to loved
Happy turns to sad
Social turns to alone
Canfident turns to scared
Hopeful turns to hopeless
We turn into nothing.
Almost like we never exsisted.
I should move on
but I know I'll never
Let go.
He's still in my heart
On my mind
In my soul.
But I should do what's right
and move on.
Let him live his life
without me.
Don't let him hurt
the one he's with.
Just let go.
~~Angel
Broken Hearts Club here.
Life is in the midst of...I don't know right now.
Well, I talked to Robby last night...I'm so confused. He confuses me. And makes me sad. And frustrates me. I hate love. Love is for losers. I am no loser. I don't need love...of maybe I do...maybe that's why I...*small voice* cut again last night. I'm so sorry. I just need help!! What do I do? Please someone help me? Please oh, please, just someone help me! I'm BEGGING for someone to help me right now. I keep pushing everyone away that wants to help, and I don't listen to their advice. All this anger is built up inside of me and it won't come out unless I make it bleed out!! I'm so confused and lost. Maybe Max and help me. Max, oh, Max, my sister, my friend, my refuge. I go to you for help. I don't listen and this is the price I pay. Please help me one last time. I swear I'll listen this time just help me...please? *cries* okay, I'm not really crying, but I want to soooooooo bad right now, but I'm in the middle of class so I won't.
Well, I'll try to be okay and smile.
.:Smile:. for me, the world is round.
~~Angel [depressed...idk]
Thursday, April 3, 2008
okay last post for today
ummm well i just read ur comment robby and i'm glad u like hanging out w/ me and stuff. stay with cayla. it doesn't matter that you don't know her thats why ur in a relationship with her right? to get to know her better. so STAY and be HAPPY!! =]] like me seee =]]]]]]]]]] HAPPPY even though...yeah....well
like i was saying. stay. good dog. lol
idk what i was gonna say...ciao!
~~Angel
like i was saying. stay. good dog. lol
idk what i was gonna say...ciao!
~~Angel
Broken Hearts Club
I once was loved
And my heart had soared!
I once had loved,
Now I don't know how.
Then my heart had broken;
I lost the only one
Who had ever cared for me.
Now I have no one.
My heart became mended,
Patched but not happy.
I hurt all over, inside and out.
But I knew it would never work.
I lost my love and my heart shattered!
I thought I could never love.
My heart aches for somebody
To be near me and love me.
When you tell me that you love me
My heart feels like it will slowly mend
But then I remember that you love her
And say that you want me!
What do I do and
What do I say?
Nothing.
My heart dissolves into nothing.
So I sit and cry all day
Do I listen to you?
Or beleive my heart?
I wish that I could do both.
I have lost so many things
I don't want to lose you again.
My heart is aching and I don't
Wan tit to break again.
~~Angel
Broken Hearts Club is for ppl like me and Kaila only.
My music ended...okay its back. Its a song called Help Me Out God by Superchick and I love it sooooooo much and I've only heard it once!! Amazing.
ONE MONTH AGO TODAY I FOUND OUT MY NANA HAD PASSED AWAY. I JUST WANT HER TO KNOW THAT I LOVE HER AND I WILL NEVER EVER FORGET HER...sooo....
Nana, I love you and will never forget you. You are in my heart all day everyday. Miss you,
Brittany
~~Angel
And my heart had soared!
I once had loved,
Now I don't know how.
Then my heart had broken;
I lost the only one
Who had ever cared for me.
Now I have no one.
My heart became mended,
Patched but not happy.
I hurt all over, inside and out.
But I knew it would never work.
I lost my love and my heart shattered!
I thought I could never love.
My heart aches for somebody
To be near me and love me.
When you tell me that you love me
My heart feels like it will slowly mend
But then I remember that you love her
And say that you want me!
What do I do and
What do I say?
Nothing.
My heart dissolves into nothing.
So I sit and cry all day
Do I listen to you?
Or beleive my heart?
I wish that I could do both.
I have lost so many things
I don't want to lose you again.
My heart is aching and I don't
Wan tit to break again.
~~Angel
Broken Hearts Club is for ppl like me and Kaila only.
My music ended...okay its back. Its a song called Help Me Out God by Superchick and I love it sooooooo much and I've only heard it once!! Amazing.
ONE MONTH AGO TODAY I FOUND OUT MY NANA HAD PASSED AWAY. I JUST WANT HER TO KNOW THAT I LOVE HER AND I WILL NEVER EVER FORGET HER...sooo....
Nana, I love you and will never forget you. You are in my heart all day everyday. Miss you,
Brittany
~~Angel
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
poems. again.
Music Box
I turn the key
Round and round
Till my fingers
Hurt just so I can hear
The precious song that plays.
It reminds me so much of you
And how much I miss you.
It speaks for us
Our silent goodbye's.
It cries for us
Our unshed tears.
It mends for us
Our broken hearts,
Reaching and stretching,
But narrowly missing each other.
It plays for us
Our music of refuge.
First for you, as I suspect,
You went to it for comfort
And now its my turn.
The delicate little box
That holds our unsaid bond.
The music box is the only thing
That helps me truly remember
Who I am
And where you are.
If not for that little box,
I would not know what to do,
But I'd rather have that
Than not have you.
~~Angel
Not finished yet...
I once was loved
And my heart had soared!
I once had loved,
But now I don't know how.
Then my heart had broken;
I lost the only one
Who had ever cared for me.
Now I have no one.
My heart became mended,
Patched but not happy.
I hurt all over, inside and out.
But I knew it would never work.
I lost my love and my heart shattered!
That's all I got.
~~Angel [happy, I guess...I love music! (random)]
I turn the key
Round and round
Till my fingers
Hurt just so I can hear
The precious song that plays.
It reminds me so much of you
And how much I miss you.
It speaks for us
Our silent goodbye's.
It cries for us
Our unshed tears.
It mends for us
Our broken hearts,
Reaching and stretching,
But narrowly missing each other.
It plays for us
Our music of refuge.
First for you, as I suspect,
You went to it for comfort
And now its my turn.
The delicate little box
That holds our unsaid bond.
The music box is the only thing
That helps me truly remember
Who I am
And where you are.
If not for that little box,
I would not know what to do,
But I'd rather have that
Than not have you.
~~Angel
Not finished yet...
I once was loved
And my heart had soared!
I once had loved,
But now I don't know how.
Then my heart had broken;
I lost the only one
Who had ever cared for me.
Now I have no one.
My heart became mended,
Patched but not happy.
I hurt all over, inside and out.
But I knew it would never work.
I lost my love and my heart shattered!
That's all I got.
~~Angel [happy, I guess...I love music! (random)]
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
we live we love we forgive
and never give up cause the days we are given are gifts from above and today we remember to live and to lo-o-ove. whoooooo i love superchick!!
http://www.dizzler.com/music/Superchick/We_Live
veryyyy nice sooong!! it makes meh happy!
HAHAHA I WAS RIGHT!! My friend told me!!! HA! She said he's only going out with her to forget about me! I was RIGHT!!!! HA IN UR FACE!!!! who called it? MEEEEE!!! yeah...can you tell i'm hyper? lol.
HYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!! ha...ha...haaaa........
~~Angel [hyper, mad, idk what else...] *sigh*
http://www.dizzler.com/music/Superchick/We_Live
veryyyy nice sooong!! it makes meh happy!
HAHAHA I WAS RIGHT!! My friend told me!!! HA! She said he's only going out with her to forget about me! I was RIGHT!!!! HA IN UR FACE!!!! who called it? MEEEEE!!! yeah...can you tell i'm hyper? lol.
HYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!! ha...ha...haaaa........
~~Angel [hyper, mad, idk what else...] *sigh*
I'm swearing right now
I just don't want to type it allllll out.
I DO believe you, Robby. I went back to what I did before and I didn't want to but I did it! All because of you. Because I. Love. You.
Just stay with Cayla. Okay? She makes you happy. Probably happier than I made you. So, be happy with HER not ME. I'll move on. I'll try to anyway. Try my hardest.
That video made you cry? Well, I've been crying sice the other day! When I found out that you and Cayla were together. I literally felt my heart being ripped out of me and being torn into little tiny pieces.
But I will heal - mostly.
And if you love me, why are you dating her? And if she loves you and you love her back, then why do you love me? Just make a decision, because I will not be able to move on unless you do.
That's all the emo depression I'm allowed today. Soooooooo....
BE HAPPY AND
.:SMILE:.THE WORLD IS ROUND!! =]]]]]]]]]]]]]
~~Angel [NOT emo depressed][Happy and preppy...okay, not preppy, but happy and positive!]<333333
I DO believe you, Robby. I went back to what I did before and I didn't want to but I did it! All because of you. Because I. Love. You.
Just stay with Cayla. Okay? She makes you happy. Probably happier than I made you. So, be happy with HER not ME. I'll move on. I'll try to anyway. Try my hardest.
That video made you cry? Well, I've been crying sice the other day! When I found out that you and Cayla were together. I literally felt my heart being ripped out of me and being torn into little tiny pieces.
But I will heal - mostly.
And if you love me, why are you dating her? And if she loves you and you love her back, then why do you love me? Just make a decision, because I will not be able to move on unless you do.
That's all the emo depression I'm allowed today. Soooooooo....
BE HAPPY AND
.:SMILE:.THE WORLD IS ROUND!! =]]]]]]]]]]]]]
~~Angel [NOT emo depressed][Happy and preppy...okay, not preppy, but happy and positive!]<333333
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